Working with Children and Young People
A Guide for Professionals Working With Children who are Affected by Domestic Violence
(Produced by South Birmingham Domestic Violence Forum, supported by the Police Authority, Community Safety Partnership and SRB 5)
Service Responses
DO remember that your initial response is extremely important. Validate what the child is telling you, ensure s/he knows that you are listening and that you believe what you are being told. Reassure the child that they have done the right thing in telling you and that the domestic violence is not their fault.
DO be honest with the child from the outset; explain the limitations to confidentiality to ensure that the child can control what s/he tells you. Explain what you will do and how you will record any information given.
DO ensure that the child feels comfortable talking to you; give her/him your name and encourage the child to contact you again in the future should s/he need to. If the child wants you to contact her/him make sure that you have a safe way of doing this before agreeing to do so.
DO use language that is appropriate to the child’s age and ability and ensure that you are not overloading the child with information. This is especially important when talking to children about confidentiality.
DO listen for ‘coded’ talking from children; don’t assume or expect they will name things in the way that you do.
DO be trustworthy in your work with children; do what you say you are going to do, set and maintain boundaries around your work and don’t make promises you can’t keep.
DO allow the child to be in control; offer choices, go at her/his pace, ask the child what they want to happen next and ask what you can do to help.
DO allow children to be children and don’t make them responsible for adult stuff.
DO prepare yourself for disclosures of abuse and domestic violence; be aware of other organisations who can offer support, ensure this information is up to date and that you are familiar with the referral process. Where appropriate, give the child contact telephone numbers for her/him to access in their own time and ensure that you are aware of out-of-hours support in the event of an emergency.
DO be aware of the link between domestic violence and Child Protection; be clear about your responsibilities with regard to Child Protection and ensure that the child understands what may happen.
DO be non-judgemental in your response to children; respond to each child’s individual needs and be aware that children’s experiences will differ depending on ability, age, culture, ethnicity, gender, race, religion or sexuality.
DO record any information you are given. This will validate what the child has told you and ensure continuity in support.
DO develop links with other agencies working in this field and make the most of networking opportunities.
DO be aware of your own and your organisation’s limitations; seek advice from other professionals and acknowledge that other services may be more appropriate.
DO follow up any referral that you have made with the organisation and the child, and ensure that the child understands what is going on throughout the process.
DO remember that often the best way to support children is to support their mum!
Organisational Responses
DO provide a consistent response to women and children affected by domestic violence.
DO develop an organisational Domestic Violence Policy that is taken on board at a senior level and ensure it is implemented and regularly reviewed.
DO raise awareness of this issue within your organisation and provide training for staff members and volunteers, ensuring that it is updated regularly.
DO ensure that staff members are aware of other organisational policy and procedures that may have an impact on their work, including policies on confidentiality, child protection, suicide and self-harm.
DO develop a comprehensive and up-to-date list of other organisations who can provide specialist support.
DO regularly monitor, review and evaluate services that you offer to women and children experiencing domestic violence.
DO acknowledge that working with domestic violence will be difficult for staff members and put in place appropriate systems to support staff.
DO acknowledge that the best way of supporting children is often to support their mum and provide services that give the opportunity for family support.
DO develop and/or display publicity material about domestic violence in ways that are accessible to the service user, including publicity that is available in different languages and formats.
DO raise awareness of this issue within the local community.
DO take a multi-agency approach to domestic violence work and have representation on local domestic violence fora where possible and appropriate.
DO acknowledge that in cases of domestic violence, mediation between the victim and the perpetrator is NEVER an appropriate response as it jeopardises women’s and children’s safety.
